Wheezy.......... is not the average dog

when Zach was born my mother-in-law gave me cookies that came with a little blue bear (seen above) and a balloon..... obviously the blue bear became Wheezy's baby.  it was on the counter and Wheezy would keep stealing it so we finally gave it to her.  She would hold it between her legs like this - she totally treated it like a baby.... which was ironic since we just brought ours home from the hospital.

I haven't blogged about the dog for quite a while because since Zach was been born she is not in the house all day every day since it's been great weather. That's why we are a much happier family in the summer :) I dread winter because she will be in the house all the freakin' time. UGH! So let me update you on what our crazy dog has been up to over the last 5 months.

This is the side view of our house. We have a corner lot and the lot across the street where I was standing and the one across the street in front of us are vacant. So we only have 2 neighbors that share fence with us.

All of the screens in our windows are destroyed because Wheezy will paw at them and jump on the windows.... I had Brian remove the sliding screen door from the back door ages ago because we looked so white trash with the screen just blowing in the wind. We pretty much need to do this with all the screens. Wheezy knows where we are at throughout the house when she is outside and will follow us around the house and paw at those windows. That includes bugging our windows of our bedroom in the mornings when we were trying to sleep. Oh heck no! Everyone that knows me knows how much i LOVE to sleep in. Also, I told Brian if she starts doing that to Zachary's window when he moves into his room I'll be pissed. So after Zach was born Brian built a door blocking off that little alleyway on the side of our house where all the bedrooms are. It's so nice! He also used our old BBQ that bit the dust to barricade our kitchen window so she cant jump into the window of the kitchen anymore. That's so nice too! And yeah I said jump into the window.... she would jump up to the window (which is very high) hook her paws on the inside window seal and look into the house to see what we were doing. She scared the living crap out of me the first time she did this. So now she only has our 2 dinning room windows and the back sliding doors to harass.

Wheezy is not allowed to be in the house anymore unsupervised. That means when we are gone she has to be outside. That is because of all the stuff she destroys while we are gone: binks, bottles, toys, my sunglasses, trash dumped every where, etc. So a few times this spring we got home and noticed that she was outside in the front yard waiting for us to get home. Crap she got out again - but how??? There were no new holes around the fence (Brian had plugged all of those up) so we couldn't figured out what was going on. One day my father-in-law came over and beat us home and noticed my dog JUMP OVER THE FENCE!! We have an 8ft fence people! What dog does that? So we became even more white trash and Brian rigged an electric fence on the inside of our fence that faces the street. This helped :) Both Brian and I so badly wanted to see her get shocked because we thought it would be funny but we never saw it. And no we are not being cruel!!! My retarded husband wanted to make sure he wasn't hurting his baby (the dog) and actually test shocked himself on this fence...... um can we say stupid?! He said it didn't hurt it's just a little shock - mostly surprising. We only turned it on for a few days. It's still up but it's not turned on - that's enough of a threat. So Wheezy stays in our backyard now....

This is the gate that Brian built that is on the side of the house and on it is hanging the electrical box to the electric fence.... As you can barely see in the picture below. It hung on the top inside of our fence along the highest horizontal support beam. We are so ghetto.

Or so we thought. We just found this weekend from our neighbor who lives behind us that Wheezy jumps the back fence into his backyard so she can play with her boyfriend. SERIOUSLY!!! He has a pretty boy dog - i think he is a Doberman? Anyway he is a very nice dog and we call him Wheezy's boyfriend because they would play together through the fence. He would stick his nose through one of the warped boards and then Wheezy would "box" the board; stuff like that. Well we would notice that her boyfriend would whine by the fence so I would jokingly say "Wheezy you're boyfriend wants you to go play!" I didn't realize how literal this was. She would jump the fence to go play with him! I guess she jumps back there to play, and then if the neighbor opens their backdoor to check on them she'll jump right back over to our yard. CRAZY!!! He said he doesn't mind that they are really nice to one another and just play around. What dog does this?!?!?!! We do not have the average dog. Oh well. I guess our dog can continue to have her little play dates.

P.S.  I actually wrote this whole post yesterday but saved it as a draft so I could post it today.  When I came home from Target today my next door neighbor lingered outside his garage.  So I said hello when I got out of his car.  He was waiting for me since he saw me drive up.  It was because he needed to tell me that Wheezy got into his back yard yesterday because she dug a huge hole between our properties... more like a tunnel since it goes under our fence.  Turns out that this is the second time she has been in his backyard.  This is not ok.  These are our perfect neighbors - the "jones'" I guess you could jokingly call them because we desperately envy the concrete they had laid... which we will copy when we get our taxes back.  He patched up the hole on his side and "encourages" us to do the same.  He didn't seem overly pleased.  I was like I'm so sorry!  We've been having a difficult time keeping her in because she is constantly digging new holes and can even jump the fence.  He said yeah I've seen her do it.  Seriously!  Have Brian and I been the only ones NOT to see her do this?  I guess the first time she was in his yard she jumped over there. I'm so stressed out.  I don't know how to fix the situation.  Wheezy is such a freak of nature.